ScrappleFace: Divided Congress to Use Separate Restrooms

ScrappleFace: Divided Congress to Use Separate Restrooms: "Divided Congress to Use Separate Restrooms
by Scott Ott

(2005-01-03) -- The 109th U.S. Congress, which convenes tomorrow, will be so deeply divided that Republicans and Democrats will use separate restrooms, according to Congressional sources.

Leaders in the House and Senate have already allocated funding for door signs designating men's and women's restrooms for each of the two major parties.

Debates in committee have centered the relative positions of facilities to the right or left of the House and Senate chambers.

Democrats said they'll fight any effort by the Republican majority to position them to the far left of the main halls. The threat of a Democrat restroom filibuster looms as Republicans exercise their growing political power.

Aides also report gathering momentum for a Republican effort to 'privatize' public restrooms, sparking some Democrats to wonder aloud if the facilities will be 'there for you when your time comes.'" [ Satire ]