Satire: Pelosi Offers Cure for GOP ‘Culture of Corruption’

"Pelosi Offers Cure for GOP ‘Culture of Corruption’
by Scott Ott

(2005-11-29) — Rep. Nancy Pelosi, D-CA, today offered some rare advice to Republicans about how to deal with what she calls the GOP’s “culture of corruption,” just a day after Rep. Randy ‘Duke’ Cunningham, R-CA, resigned after pleading guilty to federal corruption charges.

“The problem with Duke Cunningham, Tom DeLay and Scooter Libby is not that they allegedly broke the law,” said Rep. Pelosi, “because the law is a fluid concept that is valid, or not, at any given moment depending on the latest judicial ruling. So, the Republican problem is bad timing. They did these unethical things at a time when they are still illegal, instead of working to get a favorable court ruling first.”

The House minority leader cited abortion, homosexual marriage and the recent Supreme Court eminent domain decision as examples of unethical and formerly illegal behavior that are now available to many law abiding citizens.

She contrasted the Republican “culture of corruption” with her own party’s “culture of constitutional correction.”

“If you want to leak the names of CIA agents, or accept bribes in exchange for legislative favors,” Rep. Pelosi said, “you have to get some judge to make it constitutional first. Forty years ago a woman couldn’t legally abort her husband’s baby so she could marry her girlfriend and live in condo built on a site that city council confiscated from a poor retired couple. But now, it’s totally legal for many Americans." -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace

ROTFL. Any wonder why most Americas are frustrated ans suspicious of politicians in general? LOL at the lunacy depicted above by Scott Ott. He is never far from the satirically twisted truth and one of the most pointed satirists armed with a keyboard and a cup of coffee... zz

Iranian Pinocchio

Carbon Dioxide Highest in 650,000 Years !

"Analysis of carbon dioxide in the ancient Antarctic ice showed that at no point in the past 650,000 years did levels approach today's carbon dioxide concentrations of around 380 parts per million (ppm). The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) projects that atmospheric carbon dioxide levels could reach 450-550 ppm by 2050, possibly resulting in higher temperatures and rising sea levels (see 'Ocean levels rising twice as fast'). There is fear that climate change could create a class of environmental refugees displaced from their homes by rising oceans, increasingly catastrophic weather, and expanding deserts.

Carbon dioxide is the principal "greenhouse" gas thought to be driving global warming. Humans boost carbon dioxide levels primarily by the combustion of fossils fuels and deforestation, and accordingly, atmospheric concentrations have risen sharply since the industrial revolution. Today the United States, the world's largest economy and consumer of energy, produces about 24% of global carbon dioxide emissions. More...

Just remember this while you are pumping your favorite hydrocarbon fuel into your gas guzzling hyrdrocarbon converter this winter. Oh and let's not forget to burn another few million acres of forest globally while we are at it this spring. We need to ensure the expansion of more urban pavement to support -- what else -- more gas guzzling hydrocarbon converters in the so called "backward", "ignorant" and "un-developed" corners of the globe. We are so screwed! Look at this graph and then try to convince yourself that the so called most intelligent life form on this planet, has not out smarted itself in more ways than one!

Happy Thanksgiving !

White House Doubts Zarqawi Among Dead

We now see in less that 6 hours Main Stream Media (MSM) backpeddling from the original story as the following statement was released from the White House...

Trent Duffy, a White House spokesman, said reports of al-Zarqawi's death were "highly unlikely and not credible." --- AP Update

Al-Zarqawi May Be Among Dead in Iraq Fight

(BAGHDAD) Iraq - U.S. forces sealed off a house in the northern city of Mosul where eight suspected al-Qaida members died in a gunfight — some by their own hand to avoid capture. A U.S. official said Sunday that efforts were under way to determine if terror leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi was among the dead.

Insurgents, meanwhile, killed an American soldier and a Marine in separate attacks over the weekend, while a British soldier was killed by a roadside bomb in the south.

In Washington, a U.S. official said the identities of the terror suspects killed in the Saturday raid was unknown. Asked if they could include al-Zarqawi, the official replied: 'There are efforts under way to determine if he was killed.'

The official spoke on condition of anonymity because of the sensitivity of the information.

On Saturday, police Brig. Gen. Said Ahmed al-Jubouri said the raid was launched after a tip that top al-Qaida operatives, possibly including al-Zarqawi, were in the house in the northeastern part of the city." - More...

This is breaking news as of this posting. One can only hope that U.S. Troops have finally nailed this bastard.

The Lighter Side of Bush

President Bush was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word "tragedy". So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a "tragedy".

Tne little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy."

"No," said Bush, "that would be an accident."

A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," explained the president. "That's what we would call a great loss."

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Bush searched the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy!?"

Finally at the back of the room a small boy (Lil Johnny) raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said: "If Air Force One carrying you and Mrs. Bush was struck by a "friendly fire" missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."

Fantastic!" exclaimed Bush. "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?"

"Well," says Lil Johnny, "It has to be a tragedy, because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an accident either." -- Unknown Source

I had an OpenWeb member eMail me this one today. It was good enough to add here and share with you... (Hat Tip: - theBaptist)

Iran Resumes Uranium Processing

(London) Iran has begun to process a new batch of uranium to convert it to a gas that can be enriched into the material for nuclear bombs, diplomats say.

'Conversion has resumed,' a diplomat close to the International Atomic Energy Agency in Vienna said.

The move comes despite heavy pressure from the US and Europe for Iran to cease all nuclear activity.

Iran denies Western claims that it has a secret nuclear weapons programme, saying it just wants nuclear power..

IRAN'S NUCLEAR STANDOFF
September 2002: Work begins on Iran's first nuclear reactor at Bushehr
December 2002: Satellite photographs broadcast on US television reveal the existence of nuclear sites at Arak and Natanz. Iran agrees to an IAEA inspection
September 2003: IAEA gives Iran weeks to prove it is not pursuing atomic weapons
November 2003: Iran suspends uranium enrichment and allows tougher inspections; IAEA says no proof of any weapons programme
June 2004: Iran rebuked by IAEA for not fully co-operating with inquiry into nuclear activities
November 2004: Iran suspends uranium enrichment as part of deal for negotiations with EU
August 2005: Iran rejects EU proposals and resumes work at Isfahan nuclear plant

Uranium enriched to a low level is used to produce nuclear fuel, while further enrichment makes it suitable for use in atomic weapons." More... -- BBC

Brought to you by the country that vows to remove Israel from the map. Will the fact that no WMD was ever found in Iraq, and the pretext for invasion ironically give Iran an edge in it's quest for the holy grail of mass extermination?

Japan: Tsunami Alert

Bloomberg.com: Asia: "Japan Issues Tsunami Warning After Quake Off Hokkaido (Update1)

Nov. 15 (Bloomberg) -- Japan issued a tsunami warning for waves up to 50 centimeters high for the Pacific Ocean side of the Hokkaido and Tohoku regions after a magnitude 6.9 earthquake off the east coast of Japan at 6:39 a.m., the Japan Meteorological Agency said on its website."

Jordan Says al Qaeda Behind Blasts

ABC News: Jordan says Qaeda behind blasts: "AMMAN (Reuters) - Jordan confirmed on Saturday that Al Qaeda in Iraq was behind three deadly suicide bombings that ripped through Amman hotels this week and rejected a claim by the group that a woman was among the bombers.

"In operations foiled by the security forces, Zarqawi used Jordanians. This time our security information show that those who executed the operation were not Jordanians," the king told state news agency, referring to Jordanian-born Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi, America's deadliest foe in Iraq.

'It's clear that the perpetrators of the operations were three suicide bombers wearing explosive vests with metal beads to inflict maximum number of dead and injuries,' King Abdullah said in an interview published on Saturday."

Jordan, a close U.S. ally and one of two Arab nations to have peace treaties with Israel, had been spared al Qaeda-linked attacks that have hit other countries in the region.

Jordan spared no more. Zarqawi may now be considered a rogue even within the al Qaeda network as this latest attack is sure to alienate the Jordanian people and moderate muslims all across the region. King Abdullah will not take this lightly. Don't be surprised to see a more activist Jordan aligning with other progressive Arab nations in helping to stablize Iraq in the coming months. Playing perhaps even a role in President's Bush's exit strategy with support from more moderate Arab nations to support the new Iraqi government in peace keeping efforts any way they can. This will become even more likely as the murderer Zarqawi continues to kill innocent Arabs and Muslims outside of Iraq in the name of Islamic holy war.

Our hearts go out to the Jordanian people and we hope for even higher levels of solidarity in our mutual fight to rid the world of these human instruments of evil. - zzb

Veteran's Day 2005

Bali Bombing Mastermind Dead

Bloomberg.com: Asia: "Nov. 10 (Bloomberg) -- Indonesian police said fingerprint tests confirmed Azahari Husin, an alleged organizer of the 2002 Bali bombings and one of Indonesia's two most wanted terrorists, was among those killed in an ambush yesterday in Java.

``The fingerprints match those sent by the Malaysian police,'' deputy police spokesman Sunarko Danu Ardanto told reporters in Jakarta today.

Indonesian authorities suspect Azahari and fellow Malaysian Noordin Mohammad Top organized attacks in Indonesia including Bali that killed more than 240 people. Azahari and Top are suspected members of Jemaah Islamiyah, a Southeast Asian terrorist group linked to al-Qaeda, which analysts say probably carried out yesterday's attacks in Jordan that left 57 dead.

``We should not forget that Azahari may have worked here for three years and he must have recruited a lot of cadres during his stay,'' Bagus Sudibya, chairman of the Bali Tourism Board, said in a telephone interview. More...

One "mastermind" dead (burn in hell) and hundreds more to go.... Religious fanaticism will continue to rear it's ugly perverted head despite one less islomo-facisist mastermind on the planet. Now the world can understand why early communist governments (USSR and People's Republic of China) wanted to outlaw organized religions. To keep this very thing from happening in their societies. I am not advocating this, but it makes for an interesting paradox when contrasted with the Achilles heel of free and open democratic societies. Our very love of freedom is our source of weakness. So to rid ourselves of this danger, we will all need to begin to accept compromising some of our freedoms. Pick your poison. Stopping these terrorist bastards will be like shoveling shit against the tide.

France Riots

Europe Burns as EU Leaders Fiddle

(Toulouse) A bus is burning at the entrance of 'Le Mirail', a neighbourhood of Toulouse, France. French Prime Minister Dominique de Villepin warned that the country would impose curfews in its city suburbs where necessary to curb riots that are raging across the country.

Rioting by French youths spread to 300 towns overnight and a 61-year- old man hurt in the violence died of his wounds, the first fatality in 11 days of unrest that has shocked the country, police said Monday.

As urban unrest spread to neighboring Belgium and possibly Germany, the French government faced growing criticism for its inability to stop the violence, despite massive police deployment and continued calls for calm. One riot-hit town in suburban Paris said it was preparing to enforce a curfew.

Meanwhile, governments worldwide urged their citizens to be careful in France.

President Jacques Chirac, in private comments more conciliatory than his warnings Sunday that rioters would be caught and punished, acknowledged that France has failed to integrate the French-born children of Arab and black African immigrants in poor suburbs who have been taking part in the violence, according to Latvian President Vaira Vike-Freiberga, who met Monday with the French leader. More...

The typical Franco-appeasment philosophy reflected above infers that the criminals performing these acts are not to blame! Instead, as President Chriac intimates, it's social inequity that has caused this lawlessness not the individual acts of citizens violating the law! I suppose he feels this is a form of freedom of expression, Parisian style? Viva la France and the Revolution! How hypocritical coming from the mouth of the "holier than thou" EU leader.

The chickens are now coming home to roost in Central Europe. Watch for differences between countries with respect to how this lawlessness is dealt with. I suspect the Italians will not tolerate any of this, nor the Germans for that matter. But every European leader knows that how the French handle these riots, which from every indication now appear to be out of control, may very well have reprocussions in their own countries! We smell backlash coming....

Human Shield

Shhh... Don't let it get out. Libby actually works for the Secret Service. - zz

Winners of the Halloween / Fall Arcade Contest !!

!! ANNOUNCING THE WINNERS OF THE HALLOWEEN / FALL CONTEST !!

The Arcade Contest concluded at 0000GMT Nov 4th, 7PM EDT Thursday Nov 3rd !!

I am pleased to announce the following winners:

COMBINED POINTS AND CREDITS CATAGORY:

1 GRAND PRIZE WINNER:
300 Credits : VikiBabbles [ 4028 Total Points]

NEXT 2 WINNERS:
200 Arcade Credits to : ill [ 2546 Total Points]
200 Arcade Credits to : Lochnar [ 1082 Total Points]

INDIVIDUAL CATAGORY:
NEXT 5 HIGHEST ARCADE CREDITS: 100
NEXT 5 HIGHEST SITE POINTS: 100
(This catagory excluded the TOP 3 to give the new members an edge to win in this catagory)

There were six not placing in the top three that will receive 100 Credits:

Bort
losgatos
jigalo
forgotz
housewife
incest by proxy

Congratulations to all !!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Add your Blog to the OpenWeb Links Directory and don't miss a chance to
Announce Your Blog to over 3000+ visitors a week at our OpenWeb Forum and expand your site traffic!

Iran Continuing Purge of Reformers

(Tehran) Iran's government announced Wednesday that 40 ambassadors and senior diplomats, including supporters of warmer ties with the West, will be fired, continuing a purge of reformers as the regime takes an increasingly tough stance at home and abroad.

The diplomatic changes are part of a government shake-up by ultraconservative President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad that includes putting Islamic hard-liners in key posts at security agencies. Some Iranians worry the president will bring back strict social policies."

The new president, elected in June, also generated a storm of international criticism last week when he called for
Israel's eradication, saying it should be "wiped off the map." More...

Will this be the next front in the "War on Terrorism" (aka State Sponsored Murder)? You bet. The match is lit and the fuse is in the powder keg! No doubt Israel has drawn up it's battle plans... surgical strike anyone? The next President will have his/her hands full, Republican or Democrat. See which flags are being burned in the photo! We better end the partisan politics in the "Homeland" and develop a clear dose of the reality in the next REAL threat in the Middle East.

Democrats Supporting Alito ?

(WASHINGTON) Samuel A. Alito Jr. was quickly branded a hard-core conservative after President Bush announced his nomination, but a surprising number of liberal-leaning judges and ex-clerks say they support his elevation to the Supreme Court.

Those who have worked alongside him say he was neither an ideologue nor a judge with an agenda, conservative or otherwise. They caution against attaching a label to Alito.

Kate Pringle, a New York lawyer who worked last year on Sen. John F. Kerry's presidential campaign, describes herself as a left-leaning Democrat and a big fan of Alito's.

She worked for him as a law clerk in 1994, and said she was troubled by the initial reaction to his nomination. 'He was not, in my personal experience, an ideologue. He pays attention to the facts of cases and applies the law in a careful way. He is conservative in that sense; his opinions don't demonstrate an ideological slant,' she said.

Jeff Wasserstein, a Washington lawyer who clerked for Alito in 1998, echoes her view.

'I am a Democrat who always voted Democratic, except when I vote for a Green candidate — but Judge Alito was not interested in the ideology of his clerks,' he said. 'He didn't decide cases based on ideology, and his record was not extremely conservative.' " More...

CBS White House Reporter: Alioto 'Sloppy Seconds?'

(Washington) Mon Oct 31 2005 11:26:56 ET

CBSNEWS Chief White House correspondent John Roberts described the President’s selection of Judge Samuel Alito as “sloppy seconds” during today’s press gaggle with White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan.

John Roberts: “So, Scott, you said that -- or the President said, repeatedly, that Harriet Miers was the best person for the job. So does that mean that Alito is sloppy seconds, or what?”

Scott McClellan: “Not at all, John.”

Sloppy seconds” is described in the United Kingdom’s A Dictionary of Slang as:

Noun: “A subsequent indulgence in an activity by a second person involving an exchange of bodily fluids. This may involve the sharing of drink, or more often it applies to a sexual nature. E.g. ‘I’m not having sloppy seconds, I want to shag her first.’”

Well this one may or may not get traction. One thing is for certain, they have it on tape! Dan Rather, move over....