Lebanese Greenhouse Effect

"(2005-02-28) -- As the Prime Minister of Lebanon announced the resignation of his government, the United Nations warned that crowds of protestors in Beirut have generated 'dangerously high levels of carbon dioxide -- a deadly greenhouse gas.'

'All of this mob chanting, shouting and incessant breathing in and out poses a threat to the environment in the region,' said U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan. 'Of course, we must blame George Bush's foreign policy, which has increased the aspirations of millions of people in the Arab world.'

Mr. Annan said the fall of the Syrian-backed Lebanese government serves as a 'painful reminder of the Bush administration's failure to cooperate with the global community and sign the Kyoto treaty on greenhouse gases.'" - Scott Ott

Goodbye Lebanese Government

"WASHINGTON (AFP) - The White House welcomed the resignation of pro-Syrian Lebanese Prime Minister Omar Karameh saying it should pave the way for elections and a new government that was 'truly representative.'

White House spokesman Scott McClellan also repeated a call for Syrian troops to leave Lebanon. 'We are closely watching developments with great interest,' he told reporters.

'The resignation of the Karameh government represents an opportunity for the Lebanese people to have a new government which is truly representative of their country's diversity,' McClellan said.

'The new government will have the responsibility to implement free and fair elections that the Lebanese people have clearly demonstrated they desire,' McClellan added.

'The process of (forming) a new government should proceed in accordance with the Lebanese constitution and should be free of all foreign interference,' the White House spokesman said.

'It is time for Syria to fully comply with United Nations (news - web sites) Security Council resolution 1559 that means that Syria military forces and intelligence personnel leave the country,' he said. 'That will help to ensure that elections are free and fair.'

Karameh resigned on Monday in the face of mass protests, bringing to a head a political crisis sparked by the murder two weeks ago of his predecessor Rafiq Hariri.

The announcement was greeted with loud applause in Lebanon's national assembly, where the opposition had been seeking a vote of no confidence in Karameh's four-month-old government.

Tens of thousands of jubilant demonstrators in nearby Martyrs' Square in central Beirut broke into singing the national anthem."

Gimme Shelter

A day after opting out of the U.S. ballistic missile defense shield, Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin reiterated Friday that Washington must get permission from Ottawa before firing on any incoming missiles over Canada. ...

Lebanese Government to Resign - Seeking Democracy

Significant uprising in Lebanon against the occupation of Syrian forces is occuring in full force and Syria has yet to respond. We are witnessing Democracy on the spread in the Middle East just as President Bush had predicted. The succesful Iraqi voting process with 8 million Iraqi citizens casting their ballot was enough to spark the collapse of the Lebaneese government under the weight of the will of their people.

Lebanon's Prime Minister Umar Karami has said the whole government is to resign as opposition figures call for popular protests to continue until Syrian troops leave the country.

Karami told parliament in Beirut on Monday: "Out of concern that the government does not become an obstacle to the good of the country, I announce the resignation of the government I had the honour to lead."

The announcement was greeted with laud applause in the national assembly, where the opposition was seeking a vote of no confidence to bring down the government.

The battle is long, and this is the first step, this is the battle for freedom, sovereignty and independence," opposition MP Ghattas Khouri said.

Tens of thousands of demonstrators gathered at the nearby Martyrs' Square, amid a sea of red and white Lebanese flags, broke into singing the national anthem on hearing the news.

It will be interesting to observe Syria's reaction, which has been under a high degree of scrutiny by the U.S. Even after turning over the brother of Sadam Housain to the Iraqi authorities.

Howard Dean: "Speaks" about Intolerance

LGF (Little Green Footballs) pulled a short transcript from a recent Howard Dean speech. Wow... is the DNC in trouble!

Dean told the Hiebert fund-raiser that gay marriage was a Republican diversion from discussions of ballooning deficits and lost American jobs. That presents an opportunity to attract moderate Republicans, he said.

"Moderate Republicans can't stand these people (conservatives), because they're intolerant. They don't think tolerance is a virtue," Dean said, adding: "I'm not going to have these right-wingers throw away our right to be tolerant." - [ that about sums it up - zzb]

And concluding his backyard speech with a litany of Democratic values, he added: "This is a struggle of good and evil. And we're the good."

We wonder how many Southern / Moderate Democrats will be left in hte DNC after the reign of Howard Dean. Get out the straight jackets and thorazine.... here comes Howard. - zzb

Idol Worship is the Devil's Workshop

Wacko Jacko Feeding Frenzy Begins

The feeding frenzy is beginning early on the Michael Jackson case. Court TV reporter Diane Dimond reveals some new details on the case including a video that may be in evidence.

... That first night the two boys, aged 11 and 9, slept in Jackson's bedroom, and the rest of the family was guided to guest quarters away from the main house. And on that first trip, the boys told the grand jury, Jackson gave them the gift of a laptop computer.

The children would later tell a grand jury that on that first night, the gift helped bring about their introduction to Internet porn sites ' XXX-rated pornography ' that Jackson and his adult friend Frank Cascio Tyson helped them reach and navigate. These brothers had just entered an entirely new way of life....

If only a portion of these stories are true Jackson's career is OVER and he faces some serious time behind bars. - zzb

Has the Worm Turned? Palestinians Angry Over Tel Aviv Attack

Palestinians Angry Over Tel Aviv Attack Official condemnations and denials were followed by public anger toward the perpetrators as Israeli blamed Syria and the Palestinian militant group Islamic Jihad, which claimed responsibility for the attack. The Palestinians pointed fingers at the Lebanese guerrilla group Hezbollah. Syria denied the allegations.

Palestinian leader Mahmoud Abbas convened his top security chiefs directly after the bombing and issued a strong statement pledging to track down and punish the culprits. The three main Palestinian militant groups ? including Islamic Jihad ? initially denied involvement. A branch of the Al Aqsa Martyrs' Brigades in the West Bank city of Nablus, even condemned the attack.

Is it possible that Palestine will pressure Syria in this strage turn of events? Have the Palestinian people finally had enough of outside groups sabotaging their piece process? Syria is in the hot seat once again and this time by a most unlikely source. - zzb

Mubarak Imposes Democracy - U.S. Frustrated

Satire flows once again from Scott's pen:

(2005-02-26) -- In another setback for the Bush administration, Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak told a national TV audience Saturday that he would impose democratic presidential elections on this tranquil Arab dictatorship.

Mr. Mubarak -- who has run unopposed every six years since becoming president in 1981 after the assassination of Anwar Sadat -- called for 'more freedom and democracy' and asked parliament to amend the constitution to allow 'direct, secret balloting, giving the chance for political parties to run for the presidential elections and providing guarantees that allow more than one candidate for the people to choose among them with their own will'

Democrats in the U.S. Congress wasted no time pointing out that White House foreign policy had failed again.

'How is President Bush going to carry out his promise to invade dictatorships and impose freedom if they keep announcing changes like this?' said an unnamed Democrat Senator. 'I wouldn't be surprised if we saw a domino effect, with one Arab nation after another falling into the democracy camp, thereby making the Bush foreign policy an obsolete embarrassment.'

In completely unrelated news, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice cancelled an expected trip to Egypt the night before Mr. Mubarak announced the democratic reforms." - Scott Ott

See the post below. Satire aside, has anyone noticed that Democracy is on the rise in the Middle East? We suspect the Sultans are swallowing hard in Riddya and Dubai. - zzb

Democracy Taking Hold in Eqypt?

Egypt is sending signals to it's people that democracy may be on the move in Eqypt as well. President Honi Mubarak has been watching the intense protests in neighboring countries demanding changes and reforms toward a greater voice of the people in choosing leaders.

CAIRO (AFP) - President Hosni Mubarak said he had told parliament to amend Egypt's constitution to allow direct presidential elections in which anyone can stand and all citizens can vote by secret ballot.

The announcement, welcomed by the opposition as a first step, comes amid US pressure on Egypt to accelerate democratic reform and follows months of unprecedented protests in which demonstrators have denounced the likelihood of Mubarak being elected to a fifth six-year term.

In a televised speech, Mubarak hailed what he called an historic move signalling a new era of political reform. He said he had asked the constitution to be amended before May in time for the next presidential election.

"I took this initiative to open a new era of reform," said the 76-year-old Mubarak who has ruled Egypt since his predecessor Anwar Sadat was assassinated in 1981.

Under the current system, parliament elects a single candidate for the presidency by a two-thirds majority, whose name is then put to a referendum.

The move would "for the first time in Egyptian history, allow everyone who is able and willing to serve the fatherland ... to present their candidacy for direct election as president of the republic."

Both the lower and upper houses of parliament will convene extraordinary sessions to study Mubarak's demand, an official said.

One can only hope that real democracy is beginning to take root. Wouldn't it be ironic that the far fetched idea of GW Bush actually DOES change the face of the Middle East?

A Marriage Made in Hell

Iran and Syria -- a partnership in terror and hatred depicted here by C&F as a marriage made in hell. The Syrian and Iranian governments who support such groups as Hamas and Hezzboulah, whose terrorists focus on killing innocent civilians, need to be held accountable for their inaction in hunting down and destroying these groups. Indeed they need to be held accountable for supporting them financially and by sheltering their leadership. As this is being posted, victims of a suicide bombing in Tel Aviv, not more than a few hours ago, are being counted and body bagged.

So when will the UN take action? When hell freezes over. When will the EU take action and REALLY pressure Iran and Syria? When that same hell becomes host to the Winter Olympics.

Back from Singapore

We'll were back from Singapore and no worse for wear. Coming back to snow and more snow in the north East was not quite what I was looking for. The 18oz New York Strip steak that I devoured last night however was.

Singapore is a wonderful city. This past visit on business has been my second visit there and the people remain wonderful. The women are beautiful. The country itself is very westernized and safe. The same cannot be said for the other countries in that region - dunge fever, malaria, bird flu, kidnappings and terrorism abound.

Great to be back, and it seems there is plenty of new material afoot for ZZ News & Satire!

Off to Asia: Singapore Next Week!

Folks... looks like we'll be off to Asia tommorow. Business calls.... in Singapore no less. Temp 91F so I am sort of looking forward to it. It's freezing here! I've been there before and loved it. We'll do our best to keep the blog moving along but don't expect much for the next two days in the way of intensive posts. I doubt I'll be able to blog at 38,000 ft. Not sure what kind of internet service we'll have at the hotel either but I should be able to get out a post or two next week.

Hey -- how about leaving some comments on the posts below in the meantime?

Also --- if you are not already hooked up with these blog surfing services what are you waiting for? They're FREE :

A Rose by Any Other Name

Oh my Aikin - Johnson! Which couples get your vote?

North Korea Capable of Hitting the U.S. With Bio Weapons

North Korean rockets can strike United States: CIA : HindustanTimes.com: "CIA director Porter Goss has warned that North Korean missiles are capable of reaching the United States with a nuclear weapon-sized payload.

Testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee a week after North Korea claimed it has nuclear weapons, Goss on Wednesday said the US intelligence community's assessment is that the North Korean missile, the TD-2, is capable of reaching the United States with a nuclear weapon-sized payload.

He also noted that Iran is pursuing long-range ballistic missiles. Rejecting the Iranian claim that it is interested only in nuclear power, Goss said, 'We are more concerned about the dual-use nature of the technology.'

Goss said, echoing what other officials had already said, that Iran was 'supporting some anti-coalition activities in Iraq.' He added that Iran could encourage attacks on Israel through Hezbollah in hopes of derailing peace between Israel and the Palestinians.

He also warned the Committee that there is an emerging threat from experienced fighters now fighting US and other forces in Iraq."

The world is just filled with good news these days, isn't it? We smell more "Manifest Democracy" (not to be confused with Manifest Destiny) on the horizon...

Even far more disturbing.....

By PERCY MANN WASHINGTON -- North Korea has aimed hundreds of long-range missiles tipped with anthrax, smallpox, bubonic plague and other deadly viruses directly at the United States. And there is a "very real and disturbing chance" they will launch them, intelligence sources have warned President George W. Bush and key members of Congress, "before the year is out." To make matters worse, say the sources, the "virus missiles" can't be stopped. Once in the air, even if they miss their target or we blow them out of the sky with defensive missiles of our own, the viruses will still escape into the atmosphere -- and might possibly wipe out even more people over a wider area than if we let them sail uncontested into American air space and slam into American soil. As it stands, the Pentagon has projected that a single virus missile could wipe out 70 to ...

Time we wrap up Iraq... and focus on the real threats... - zzb

Plotting a New Course for the DNC

courtesy D. Wright -- Suggest a caption for this one in "Your Comments?" below...

The Saudi's Say: "Happy Valentine" You'all !

"Saudi Arabia's morality police are on the scent of illicit red roses as part of a clampdown on would-be St Valentine's lovers in the strict Muslim kingdom.

The Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, Saudi Arabia's powerful religious vigilantes, have banned shops from selling any red flowers in the run-up to February 14.

Florists say the move is part of an annual campaign by the committee -- whose members are known as 'mutawwaeen' or volunteers -- to prevent Saudis marking a festival they believe flouts their austere doctrine of 'Wahhabi' Islam. ..." - C&F

Christina Aguilera's Valentine Present

Pop star Christina Aguilera is to marry music executive Jordan Bratman, the singer's agent has confirmed.

Bratman, 26, proposed to Grammy-winning singer Aguilera, 23, on holiday at an undisclosed location. The pair have been together for more than two years.

"No wedding plans have been set yet," said Aguilera's agent Meghan Prophet.

Aguilera burst onto the pop scene in 1999, winning a best new artist Grammy in 2000. Her hits include What a Girl Wants, Dirrty and Beautiful. Bratman presented his fiancee with a diamond ring designed by jeweller Stephen Webster on Friday, said Ms Prophet.

Does anyone want to give odds on this marriage lasting more than 3 years?

Artist's Stickers Land Man in Jail !

From Clovis NewMexico Newspaper: Stickers on a Clovis man's car portray cartoon images of bare-breasted female devils in sexually compromising positions. And the images have caught the attention of Clovis police. Officials have charged 31-year-old Dean Young, the owner of a yellow Ford Focus displaying the images, with distribution of sexually oriented materials to minors. The charge is a misdemeanor carrying a maximum punishment of 364 days in jail and $1,000 fine. Young is scheduled to appear in magistrate court on the charges in the next few weeks.

Young in turn has notified the American Civil Liberties Union, which is considering representing Young; an ACLU spokesman said Young's First Amendment rights may have been violated. Officials at the ACLU said they've never seen the stickers "one on each side of the car near the rear window, each about 4 by 6 inches wide" but based on the police report said they doubt the stickers violate the law.

"I've never heard of anyone getting a ticket for a sticker on a car," said Peter Simonson, executive director of the ACLU of New Mexico. "Unless the stickers are directly and immediately inciting people to violence that's the only way the Supreme Court has said that free speech can be somehow limited."

Chinese News Media Critical of North Korea

BEIJING, Feb. 12 - State-controlled media and censored Internet chat rooms in China have become uncommonly critical of North Korea in the two days since it declared that it had nuclear weapons, even as the Foreign Ministry here has said fairly little.

The criticism by state-run media is important because the Chinese government has tended to take a protective position, at least in public, toward North Korea, its neighbor and sometime ally. China also has more influence with North Korea than any other country does, providing it with much of its fuel, food and other supplies - although even Chinese influence has proved limited at times.

Darwin Award Candidate?: Arkansas Man Shoots His Testicles

"We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid." -Benjamin Franklin

How's this for a piece of imbecilia? A candidate of the Darwin Award for self cleansing the human gene pool! :

[Arkansas Democrat Gazette]:"Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early one Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were returning to Des Arc after a frog-gigging trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older-model truck had burned out. A replacement fuse was not available, but Wallis noticed that the 22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering-wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet the headlights again began to operate properly, and the two men proceeded eastbound toward the White River Bridge. After traveling approximately 20 miles, and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged, and struck Poole in the testicles. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exiting the pavement and striking a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will require extensive surgery to repair the damage to his testicles, which will never operate as intended. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. 'Thank God we weren't on that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off, or we might both be dead,' stated Wallis. 'I've been a trooper for 10 years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would admit how this accident happened,' said the investigating officer. On being notified of the wreck, Lavinia Poole (Poole's wife - the other half of any offspring's genome) asked how many frogs the boys had caught and whether anyone had gotten them from the truck!

(Note: Though Poole and Wallis did not die as a result of their misadventure as normally required by Darwin Award Official Rules, it can be argued that Poole did nonetheless effectively remove himself from the gene pool.)"

And so once again we remain in awe of nature's uncanny ability to fine tune her system of natural selection to help ensure the preservation of the species! - zzb

Victory Where the Sun Don't Shine

High Tech Rorschack Test?

I know what you are thinking... Oh how your mind plays nasty dirty tricks on you. Such creativity, n'est pas? A women's hand, (you know that from the nail polish right? Are you sure?), a PC mouse (It is a scroll mouse isn't it?), and a flesh colored background. Oh, one other thing... Position, Position, Position.... Put it all together in just the right orientation and, Voila! You have a modern day version of a French ink blot test. Let's see now -- Is it a vase or a old women's profile? :)




We stumbled upon this advertisment... FRENCH in origin. Where else would one expect to see something like this in mainstream media? Microtec mice will never be the same we just wonder whether any pussy will ever catch and eat this mouse?


One might consider this a new age Rorschack test for the sexually starved and perverted. Hey... lets give some credit to "She's Undone" from whence the fleshy pink image caught our eye.


If ever we needed some creative captions from all of you this is the time. So who is up for it ? Thanks for this one Jadegirl - zzb

Blogcritics.org: Michael Jackson On Trial

Everybody loves a good laugh. Blog Critics is back on the air again after some technical mishaps this afternoon. Eric has begun a chronical of sorts on Wacko Jacko that's not to be missed...

Blogcritics.org: Michael Jackson On Trial: "Jury selection begins Monday for the Michael Jackson child molestation trial. The case touches upon almost everything we ponder: celebrity, fabulous wealth, the media, sensationalism, law, image, race, sex, eccentricity, a whole lot of cosmetic surgery, and oh yeah, he's a singer or something. Looks like we're going to have to follow it - we've also included preperatory Jacksonia going back a year:" - Eric Olsen

Follow the trials and tribulations of the world's most well known psychiatric challange. Read BlogCritics today. -- zzb

UN Pre-Bukes Bush

Once again Scott Ott sticks it to the boys over at the U.N. with his usual insightful satire. We suspect that Howard Dean is not far behind on this one.

"(2005-02-10) -- The United Nations Security Council, in the wake of North Korea's admission that it has nuclear weapons, has passed a resolution 'pre-buking' the Bush administration for whatever action it might take against the communist dictatorship.

'When we learned of nuclear weapons in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK), we immediately feared a U.S. response,' said Secretary-General Kofi Annan. 'By pre-buking the U.S., the Security Council demonstrates solidarity with the future victims of the American military occupation.'

Meanwhile, Democrats in Congress have introduced a resolution condemning President George Bush in advance for 'misleading us into conflict with North Korea simply because it's a nuclear-equipped Stalinist regime which has threatened to turn America into a lake of fire.'" - Scott Ott

Hmmm... Food for thought. - zzb

A Lost Cause ?

Air Head Quote of the Day

CAUTION: Genius at work !




"'What is the name of the memory book you just got me? It's a book about memorizing. It's a memory book. And it's awesome.' -- Actress CARMEN ELECTRA to her male companion when asked by the New York Daily News what book she was reading."



That was an actual honest to God quote from the sexy hot bod . We suspect her memory was first damaged in her formative years when she was learning to adjust her training bra and could not remember just quite how to put it on.



"It's a memory book... it's awesome !" I'm sure the guy she was with doesn't give a rat's ass if she couldn't remember her own first name as long as he got some free time on those ski slopes!

Iran Warned

As if one war front was not enough...

Yahoo! News - Bush: World Must Speak with One Voice on Iran Nukes: "'The Iranians just need to know that the free world is working together to send a very clear message: Don't develop a nuclear weapon,' Bush said.

'And the reason we're sending that message is because Iran with a nuclear weapon would be a very destabilizing force in the world,' he said during a meeting with Poland's president.

Bush said he looked forward to discussing concerns about Iran with European allies. 'It's important we speak with one voice,' he said.

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (news - web sites) has raised U.S. concerns about Iran during her trip to Europe. 'I'm very pleased with the response that European leaders have given to Dr. Rice on this issue,' Bush said."

The pressure must come from the UN Security Council this time to avoid a repeat of Iraq. The question is, will countries such as France, apply the pressure or once again play the role of spoiler?

A Flower Grows in Baghdad

Suggest a caption for this image from Cam Cardow...

We're Back from Cancun !

I have not posted in a few days. Where have I been? We'll let's just say visiting a little corner of heaven. I spent the last four days in Cancun, Mexico getting away from all this insanity. Vegging out and having a great time. Snorkeling, diving, chill'in. It was great! Warm tropical breezes, tequilla and hot latin women! What more do I need to say?

But first however, the Superbowl - Then we'll pick up where we left off - zzb

ScrappleFace: Kerry: 'Terror' Groups Deserve Voice in Iraq's Future

Scott Ott nails John Kerry's appearence on Meet the Press this past Sunday. If you tuned in you were treated to the John F. Kerry's school of babbling uncertainty and stumbling ambiguity while responding to Tim Russert's most simplest questions. Yes Scott, he is indeed honing his debating skills for the FY08 campaign.

ScrappleFace: Kerry: 'Terror' Groups Deserve Voice in Iraq's Future: "Kerry: 'Terror' Groups Deserve Voice in Iraq's Future
by Scott Ott

(2005-01-31) -- Sen. John Kerry. D-MA, said today that history will judge Sunday's landmark election in Iraq as an 'utter failure for George W. Bush if the U.S. cannot find a way to give al Qaeda and other disenfranchised so-called 'terror' groups a voice in Iraq's new government.'

'We use that word 'terrorist' to marginalize and demonize people whose way of expressing ideas is culturally different from ours,' said Mr. Kerry. 'But when a man takes up the scimitar to behead an innocent civilian, or straps on the exploding vest for a walk through the marketplace, he's just passionately stating his philosophy. Who are we to judge his methods?'

Mr. Kerry, who told NBC's Tim Russert that he's 'keeping his options open' for another failed run for the White House in 2008, denied Republican accusations that he's on the 'wrong side of history' in his opposition to Bush administration efforts to bring freedom to the Middle East.

'How can they say I'm on the wrong side of history?' he asked rhetorically. 'I'm speaking out against Bush blunders in Iraq, and I plan to vote for another $80 billion to fund the blundering. You tell me which side of history I'm on.'" - Scott Ott

Pointing the Way Forward