Bringing You The Latest In News Satire and Sarcasm...
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Partial Birth Abortion
We wonder if this topic might not trump the war in Iraq during the 2008 election campaign. Not likely, but it's a possibility. This is a topic that may create a defining moment for both Republican and Democrat candidates in the run up to the election. The court has signaled that it may be ready for a test of Roe v. Wade. Round one goes to the unborn.
Al Qaeda Surrenders Under Pressure from Democrat Pull-Out Bill
(BAGHDAD) — Al Qaeda in Iraq today announced it would cease all martyrdom operations, bombings, kidnappings and attacks on U.S. and Iraqi forces just a day after the Democrat-controlled U.S. Senate sent a bill to President George Bush that sets a timeline for withdrawal from Iraq.
“Under orders from our supreme ruler, Usama bin Laden, we announce our complete surrender and ask for mercy from our triumphant conquerors,” said an unnamed spokesman on a prerecorded audio statement released on al-Jazeera and CNN. “We are defenseless in the face of the Democrats’ aggressive pull-out schedule — Allah be praised.”
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and House Majority Leader Nancy Pelosi plan a trip to Baghdad next week to receive the surrender documents from an al-Qaeda emissary who has committed to meeting them in a public marketplace for the historic ceremony." -- as reported by Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
(SATIRE) — President George Bush is a 'coward' for failing to appear among the eight Democrat presidential candidates at last night’s debate at South Carolina State University, according to several top Democrat operatives.
While candidates at the debate mentioned Mr. Bush some 25 times during the 90-minute MSNBC-televised event, Mr. Bush declined to make an appearance to defend himself against their accusations.
The White House neglected, this morning, to offer a substantive reason for the president’s absence from the forum at which he, and his policies, were a main topic of discussion.
“The president is not seeking a third term,” said Acting White House Press Secretary Dana Perino. “He offers no apology to the hundreds of Democrats in the auditorium at South Carolina State, nor to the dozens of viewers watching on MSNBC.”" -- as reported by satirist Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up -- fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied,
"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear.
Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Justin aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"
"No," the boy said, "he works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids." --- Hat Tip: megitt33
WASHINGTON -- A flock of small jets took flight from Washington Thursday, each carrying a Democratic presidential candidate to South Carolina for the first debate of the political season.
For Sens. Hillary Rodham Clinton, Barack Obama, Chris Dodd and Joe Biden, it was wheels up shortly after they voted in favor of legislation requiring that U.S. troops begin returning home from Iraq in the fall.
No one jet pooled, no one took commercial flights to save money, fuel or emissions.
All but Biden, who flew on a private jet, chartered their flights -- a campaign expense of between $7,500 and $9,000.
Federal Election Commission rules allow candidates to pay only the equivalent of first-class fare to fly on private jets owned by corporations or other special interests. But a Senate ethics bill approved earlier this year would require senators flying on corporate jets to pay full charter rates. The legislation must still be reconciled with a House bill and has yet to become law.
Several senators running for president are abiding by it anyway, either paying charter cost or avoiding corporate jets altogether, as Obama and Republican Sen. John McCain have done. Dodd pays full charter rates when he flies on private planes. The Clinton and Biden campaigns did not immediately explain their policies."
(SATIRE) — White House sources say President George Bush has given Sen. Harry Reid and Rep. Nancy Pelosi a list of administration officials who would make good targets for Congressional probes as part of Mr. Bush’s strategy to keep Democrats preoccupied with investigations and thus distracted from implementing their legislative agenda.
The news of the Bush strategy comes as Congressional committees have called for additional testimony from Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice over the pre-Iraq War claim that Saddam Hussein sought uranium from Niger, and from Justice Department deputy Monica Goodling, over claims that the Bush administration fired eight political appointees for political reasons.
Unnamed administration sources say the president is “pleased as punch” with the way ongoing probes of his appointees have delayed implementation of the Democrats’ “tax and spend agenda.”
“George Bush is already shaping up to be the most effective lame duck president in American history,” said one unnamed source. “Who would have thought it could be so easy to stymie the Democrats. It reminds me of Muhammad Ali’s rope-a-dope tactic.”"
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Democrats predict they can win Iraq vote: "Democrats predicted the bill would pass, albeit narrowly, while Republicans said setting a timetable on the war would hand a victory to terrorists.
Several House members said they would not try to block the bill negotiated with the Senate in a bid for party unity despite their desire for an earlier, binding withdrawal date.
'We need to claim victory for our soldiers,' said Rep. Sheila Jackson-Lee, D-Texas. 'They have done their job. It's time to bring them home now.'
The House vote scheduled Wednesday comes as the top U.S. commander in Iraq, Gen. David Petraeus, and other defense officials try to convince lawmakers that a timetable would push Iraq into chaos. Bush's promise guarantees a historic confrontation with Democrats emboldened by last year's election, which handed them control of Congress.
'For the first time, the president will have to be accountable for this war in Iraq,' House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (news, bio, voting record), D-Calif., said Tuesday. 'And he does not want to face that reality.'
The $124.2 billion bill would fund, among other things, the war in Iraq but trigger the withdrawal of troops beginning this fall. It sets a nonbinding goal of completing the pullout by April 1, 2008."
Even his old man realizes that the country has been bush-wacked. Commenting on Larry King, the former President indicated he sensed that the country may need a break. God save us from Jeb! Another "good man" in the wrong time and place. Nuff is enough of the Kennedy's, Clinton's and the Bush's. CNN.com - CNN Political Ticker:
(WASHINGTON) -- Former President George Bush told CNN's Larry King Monday that the electorate may be experiencing 'Bush fatigue.'
And it may be the reason his son, former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, is sitting out the 2008 presidential election, the 41st president said.
'There's something to that -- there might be a little Bush fatigue now,' former President Bush told CNN's Larry King when asked if he agreed with a recent assessment from GOP presidential hopeful Mitt Romney that Jeb Bush would currently be a frontrunner for the Republican party's presidential nomination if his last name wasn't Bush.
But the former president predicted his youngest son may enter politics again in the future.
'I hope that Jeb, who left office looking good, is not through with politics,' the elder Bush said. ' I think he's a good man, most other people think that, a man of principle. And I think he's got a future.'" Read More
This is from AlJazeera -- the ballot counting has begun in Syria. This is one of the biggest jokes in the middle east. The bastardization of democracy. Let's see now, we have had elections in Iraq, Iran, Palestine and now Syria... what a hot bed of personal freedom the middle east has become! Thomas Jefferson would be proud...
Al Jazeera English - News: "Counting is under way following Syria's parliamentary elections but opposition activists say there is little chance of a surprise.
A total of 167 seats in the 250-seat assembly are reserved for the ruling National Progressive Front (NPF) coalition, led by the Baath party of Bashar al-Assad, the president.
Banned opposition groups had urged their supporters to boycott the polls.
State-run newspapers reported 'massive participation' and 'fierce competition' during Sunday's polling, but an election official in the capital, Damascus, told the AFP news agency on Monday that turnout had been low.
In Syria's second city of Aleppo, 'candidates were disappointed by the low turnout,' the independent Al-Watan newspaper reported"
Little enthusiasm
The official SANA news agency said the vote had taken place "in total freedom and transparency", without giving turnout figures for the first day.
Journalists at the polling stations reported that there seemed to be little enthusiasm for the election in which nearly 12 million Syrians were eligible to vote.
"I don't really think anything is going to change, but I wanted to vote anyway," Inas Kokashsaid after casting his ballot on Monday...
Abdel-Azim said it was "pointless to take part in an election whose results are known in advance ... The NPF will come out the winner," as it has done in all organised elections since 1973. Read More...
Iraqi Student Solidarity with Virginia Tech Students
Bushra Juhi, Associated Press writer, submitted a story today on the reaction of the Virginia Tech terrorist act by the students at Iraqi Universities. There is a bond between students that transcends senseless acts of suicidal fanatics regardless of their motivations.
BAGHDAD (AP) -- Students in Baghdad, where universities have been hard hit by violence, said Monday they were saddened by last week's massacre at Virginia Tech and hung up a banner to express their solidarity with "our brothers in humanity and in pursuing knowledge."
"We want to let the whole world know that we do not support terrorism anywhere," said Yassir Nazar, head of the student union at Baghdad Technology University, who organized the hanging of the banner near the campus gate.
It reads, "We, the students of Technology University, denounce the attack at Virginia Tech. We extend our condolences to the families of the victims who faced a situation as bad as Iraq's universities do. The sanctity of campuses must be protected around the world."
"We have lost many friends and professors," said Nazar. "But in spite of our wounds, we want to show our solidarity with the students of Virginia Tech who are our brothers in humanity and in pursuing knowledge."
In Baghdad and other Iraqi cities, scores of students have been killed and their campuses targeted by Iraqi insurgents who often regard universities as bastions of Western thought and political activities they oppose.
More than 200 university professors have been killed in the past few years, and thousands have fled the country to teach at universities abroad, said Basil al-Khateeb, spokesman for the Iraqi ministry of higher education. More...
One day perhaps all this senseless violence will come to an end. Hopefully, mankind will still be around to experience it when it does.
Hot Air explains how You Tube is allowing "tribute videos" to Krazy Korean Cho Seung Hui... SICK Has You Tube crossed the line??
Just check this out. How many sick puppies are there out there?? The left leaves nothing sacred when it comes to making a political point!! This is about as sick as it gets folks...
One of them is an excuse to rail for gun control (yes, the gun control on the VTech campus work very well, didn't it?).
But the worst one is the video which argues that it's not such a big deal--that the number of those killed "by the U.S." in Iraq is far larger. And this absurd anti-Asian one, the poster of which comments about Iraq also (and makes light of the whole VTech incident). "Me Love You Long Time." Gee, I'm sure no Asian has heard that one before. (Thanks, 2 Live Crew.) Haha, funny.
Glad to see the "American" left views everything in "perspective." (Don't hold your breath for the Media Matters folks to get on the case of these items.)
In Memoriam... Pilot Lt. Cmdr. Kevin Davis of Pitsfield Mass who perished during an air show today in South Carolina.
(BEAUFORT, S.C) A Navy Blue Angel jet crashed during an air show Saturday, plunging into a neighborhood of small homes and trailers and killing the pilot, the county coroner said.
Witnesses said six planes were flying in formation during the show at the Marine Corps Air Station and one dropped below the trees and apparently crashed, sending up clouds of smoke.
It is unclear what caused the accident. Beaufort is about 45 miles north of Hilton Head Island, South Carolina. More... -- AP
The Navy aviator was killed, Beaufort County Coroner Curt Copeland said. The F/A-18's pilot is the only known fatality. The aviator's name is being withheld pending notification of next of kin.
Officials announced that Sunday's scheduled air show will go on but that the Blue Angels will not take part.
Fred Yelinek told CNN he saw the crash occur about a mile from Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort, which was holding the two-day show. He said the jet came down about 100 yards from him with an "earth-shattering rumble."
The Associated Press described the crash site as a neighborhood of small houses and trailers.
The crash took place in the final minutes of the air show, said Lt. Cmdr. Anthony Walley, a Blue Angel pilot. He said the name of the pilot would not be released until relatives were notified of the death.
"Our squadron and the entire U.S. Navy are grieving the loss of a great American, a great Naval officer and a great friend," Walley said.
A Navy statement said the pilot had been on the team for two years — and it was his first as a demonstration pilot. The accident was under investigation, the statement said.
John Sauls, who lives near the crash site, said the planes were banking back and forth before one disappeared, and a plume of smoke shot up.
"It's one of those surreal moments when you go, 'No, I didn't just see what I saw,'" Sauls said.
The Blue Angels fly F/A-18 Hornets at high speeds in close formations, and their pilots are considered the Navy's elite. They don't wear the traditional G-suits that most jet pilots use to avoid blacking out during maneuvers. The suits inflate around the lower body to keep blood in the brain, but which could cause a pilot to bump the control stick — a potentially deadly move when flying inches from other planes.
Navy Blue Angel No. 6 is shown minutes before crashing during an air show at Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort in Beaufort, S.C., Saturday, April 21, 2007. (AP Photo/Birmingham News, Mark Almond)
(WASHINGTON) - Senator Joe Lieberman (ID-CT) today made the following statement in response to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid's comment that the Iraq War is 'lost:'
This week witnessed horrific terrorist attacks by Islamist extremists in Iraq, killing hundreds of innocent civilians and leading Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid to declare that the war is 'lost.'
With all due respect, I strongly disagree. Senator Reid's statement is not based on military facts on the ground in Iraq and does not advance our cause there.
Al Qaeda's strategy for victory in Iraq is clear. They are trying to murder as many innocent civilians as possible in an effort to reignite sectarian fighting and drive us to retreat from Iraq.
The question now before us is whether we respond to these terrorist attacks by running away as Al Qaeda hopes - abandoning the future of Iraq, the Middle East, and ultimately our own security to the very same people responsible for this week's atrocities - or whether we stand united to fight them.
This is exactly the wrong time to conclude that we have lost the war in Iraq, or that our new strategy has failed. Instead, we should provide General Petraeus and his troops with the time and the resources to succeed. We should not surrender in the face of barbarism. --- Sen. Joe Liberman
Reid's reply... get this!
Friday, after Lieberman made his remarks, Reid struck again.
"The longer we continue down the President's path," the majority leader told colleagues in a Senate floor speech, "the further we will be from success."
He also pointed out that Democrats generally agree with him.
"In an effort to shift attention from this Administration's failed polities – and I say that in the plural – the President and his allies have repeatedly questioned whether I and my fellow Democrats support our troops," the majority leader told fellow senators. "No one wants us to succeed in Iraq more than the Democrats. We've proven that time and time again since this war started more than four years ago. We take a back seat to no one in supporting our troops, and we will never abandon our troops in a time of war." - AP
(Satire - Washington D.C.) — Yesterday’s Supreme Court ruling in Gonzales v. Carhart upholding the right of Congress and state legislatures to regulate abortion and, in particular, to ban partial-birth abortion, is “a blade to the back of the head of every woman in America,” according to Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-NY.
“I know I speak for my sisters across the nation,” said Sen. Clinton, “when I say that I feel like someone grabbed me by the ankles, and jammed a pair of scissors into the base of my skull and then just sucked my brains out. This is devastating to our freedoms and our sense of who we are as the largest minority group in America.”
Mrs. Clinton derided the justices who comprised the majority in the 5-4 ruling as “a gang of callous right-wingers who slaughtered the civil rights of women just as we are about to experience a new birth of freedom with the election of the first female president.”
“All that potential, all that hope is now tossed down the garbage chute,” she said, “and all because five selfish judges decided that their so-called ‘right to choose’ supersedes the life of the women’s movement. It’s despicable.” Share this Story:" -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
Watch Tony Soprano and the gang go through the highlights of 6 seasons in seven minutes with a great background narrative. So hold on to your seat belts. If you have seen ANY of these episodes, the background commentary is sure to crack you up!!
John Edwards takes it in the shorts as Scott Ott impales him for the recent disclosure that Mr. Edwards spends a small fortune routinely keeping his "do" in check for the cameras...
(SATIRE) — Democrat presidential hopeful John Edwards today unveiled the centerpiece of his 2008 White House bid, a budget-neutral proposal to provide universal hair care to every American.
The former North Carolina senator and 2004 vice presidential candidate is the acknowledged “hair policy wonk” among Democrat candidates.
Speaking to a convention of stylists and cosmetologists yesterday, Mr. Edwards described “the vast divide between the well-coiffed and the un-coiffed masses — a divide as sharp as the part in my own tawny locks.”
“Haircuts averaging $250 to $800, which I receive, are out of reach for people who live in the other America,” said Mr. Edwards. “As a result, we see far too many getting what I call back-alley haircuts for $15 to $25, or relying on home remedies for hair conditions which really need professional attention.”
The Edwards universal hair care proposal would not boost the federal deficit, or result in real tax increases, Mr. Edwards said, because the government would negotiate favorable pricing from hair care providers, and thanks to the savings wealthy Americans could subsidize the styling of the poor." -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
The Barack Obama mystique may be starting to unravel. He was far from articulate in this speech trying to connect everything but the kitchen sink to the VT shootings. Take a listen to this audio link. This is one painful audio tape to listen to -- and I am talking just about the audio quality which could be better. It's from his speech on monday in Milwaukee. In it he realizes it's not business as usual on the campaign trail and has to make some adjustments to his usual speech. What does he do? Well he tries tying the Virginia Tech massacre to Iraq, Darfur, Don Imus, you name it. Here is a bit of the transcript --- Hat Tip: michele malkin/jessica:
He said we are a violence obsessed culture. "We glorify it, we encourage it, we ignore it." In what honestly was a very boring, dry, rambling speech, he then listed a litany of examples of how violent we are. He excoriated "verbal violence" and specifically mentioned Imus but, tellingly, not Ludacris. Then, he mentioned violent crime in Milwaukee, and other examples of how violent we all are. In one bizarre example, he said that he was also talking about the "violence" of men and woman who lose their jobs to other countries. HUH?
And then he mentioned IRAQ...He started out by saying that our culture of violence is rooted in our supposed incapacity to understand we are all connected fundamentally as people (kumbayah!). We are still trapped in a belief that we can impose our wills on each other and differentiate ourselves and make ourselves feel better from one another because of the accidents of birth or race or gender, he said. We still think about our role in the world and foreign policy as if the children of Darfur are somehow less than the children here, and so we tolerate violence there. And then he said in that context:
"We base our decisions in terms of sending our young men and women to war not on the necessity of defending ourselves but the belief that somehow with military force we can achieve aims that should be achieved through diplomacy and alliances." -- Hat tip: jessica / MM
I think if he keeps this up he will implode giving Hillary an edge as well as possibly Al Gore once again. Don't count Edwards out either. This is pretty painful. I defy you to try and listen to all of this speech despite the poor audio quality.
European Press Blames NRA for Krazy Korean Killing Spree
It seems that the European Press take the view that Monday's deadly shooting was the work of the Charlton Heston and the NRA. European newspapers are blaming the lack of gun control measures in the United States and implying that Charlton Heston is indirectly responsible for the scope of the killings.
British daily The Independent writes:
"The passionate feelings of the gun lobby may be traced to the Second Amendment of the US Constitution, enshrining 'the right of the people to keep and bear arms'. Although the provision stems from the times when 'well regulated militias' were deemed necessary to protect against a British attempt to regain the lost colonies, it is the default position of any argument against greater gun control here."
"As such, it has trumped every other consideration, not least the fact that on any given day about 80 people are killed by firearms, the vast majority by murder or suicide. Gun violence may cost $2.3 billion each year in medical expenses, but it is a price, gun supporters believe, that is worth paying to protect a fundamental freedom ..."
"There is no sign of attitudes hardening. Despite the opposition of every police force in the land, Congress in 2004 allowed to lapse a 10-year federal ban on semi-automatic assault weapons, a particular favorite of violent criminals. The reaction was not exactly deafening. Even amid yesterday's shock, the initial calls were for stricter security measures on campuses -- not serious moves to reduce gun ownership."
The Times of London writes:
"The trauma of the death of the students at Virginia Tech that will spread across the university and the whole country will be magnified by the feelings of so many people who feel that they should have been able to prevent it."
"Doubtless there will be a call to review the availability of firearms. The National Rifle Association's (NRA) response is predictable too. They will point out that events such as this are not carried out by a rifle-wielding member of a weekend militia. There is no doubt that access to rapid-action shotguns makes these events even more destructive but as we have seen with suicide bombers, who are closer to spree killers than is often realized, if a person really wants to take their own life and kill others in doing so it is exceptionally difficult to prevent it."
French daily Le Monde writes:
"The shooting at Virginia Tech ... is a dramatic episode of school violence that fits into a long series of such episodes, a series topped by the drama at Columbine, the school attacked by two adolescents in 1999 ..."
"If Columbine left such a strong impression, that was because it was one of the first dramas of school violence that received broad coverage in the media. Americans were informed of what was happening in real time, via TV and the radio. The students called their families or CNN even as the killers were still roaming the corridors of the schools. ..."
"This new tragedy presents a new opportunity for American public opinion to interrogate itself about a society which, as one of the students who survived Columbine said at the time, is very much responsible for what has happened."
French conservative daily Le Figaro writes:
"It was all too easy easy for the elected representatives of the United States, from the White House to the Congress, to express their sadness yesterday; America's problem with fire-arms represents a political issue for which they share responsibility. Here is a country that represents the vanguard of development and democracy while it is legal to carry a gun in 45 of 50 states, as long as the gun is not loaded. ... At the end of 2004, the Republican-controlled Congress allowed a law to expire that prohibited the sale of semi-automatic and military weapons. Thereafter, legal changes were made to protect the producers and vendors of fire-arms from being held responsible for the actions of gun owners."
"Contrary to what one would imagine, this backward stance is not something left over from the Wild West. It goes back to the creation of the United States and the War of Independence against the English. ... While most states have issued laws designed to control the sale of arms, the NRA ensures they remain inefficient or are not applied. Strongly linked to the conservative fringe of the Republican Party, the NRA spent $400,000 a day to prevent the election of the Democratic candidate John Kerry during the 2004 presidential elections ..."
"Yesterday's massacre will surely revive the debate in the United States, but within the federal system, the question is ultimately settled by each individual state. Going back on the lapsing of the law issued by Washington could provide an opportunity for the Supreme Court to take a stance on the issue for the first time since 1939."
Italian daily Il Corriere della Sera writes:
"Shocked psychologists and sociologists ask themselves how gun violence is to be explained. Some speak of the repressed violence of a country that goes back to generations of pioneers habituated to achieve justice on their own and which is forced to face the powerful tensions within a multiracial society. Others criticize the spread of violent video games (which are, however, a phenomenon that has only emerged in recent years). In any case, gun violence is becoming a common phenomenon in the United States, one that is no longer surprising. In major cities such as New York, the extension of surveillance measures, a tough approach to crime and measures to rebuild the urban fabric have led to a drop in crime and especially in the number of homicides. But in suburban areas and smaller cities, episodes of 'ordinary violence' are on the rise. In the poorest neighborhoods, people are getting used to the use of fire-arms -- a phenomenon that is linked to the growing tendency among many young people to resort to violence to settle even minor disputes and to the ease with which weapons can be acquired."
Italian daily Il Messaggero writes:
"The bloodbath on the university campus is the work of a suicide killer -- an American suicide killer who, differently from Muslim killers, did not act out of religious motives but was driven instead by the unrest affecting broad layers of US society. America is a nation that has for some years been in danger of becoming more and more unloved in the world, especially in the poorest countries. During the period following World War II, America was seen as the guardian of democracy and was equated with the defense of liberty; today, America is a superpower that begins wars and lives with the constant necessity of having to defend itself against the enemy -- whether this enemy be called Islam or whether it bears the face of the neighbor who has done you wrong."
Spanish daily El Pais writes:
"The president of Virginia Tech called it a tragedy of monumental proportions. But similar comments could already be heard following previous tragedies of this kind. The shooting spree at the Columbine high school in Colorado, for instance, revived the debate on the necessity of better controlling access to weapons. This led to some laws being toughened and security at schools being improved. But the measures are decided by the individual states and are constantly side-stepped by means of an exaggerated interpretation of the US constitution."
German daily Bild writes:
"Now we will probably begin discussing the overly lax gun laws in the United States. There, buying a machine gun is often easier than getting a driver's license. And a new ban on violent games and killer videos will also be put back on the agenda. But in the end, nothing is likely to happen. And the next killer already lives somewhere among us. But we have little reason to point an accusing finger at the Americans. Despite strict gun legislation, we (in Germany) have experienced the school shootings in Erfurt and Emsdetten. We have to consider the problems in our society. And we have to take care of our fellow humans."
The debate over gun control is sure to begin again in earnest. The Krazy Korean's dysfunctional mind notwithstanding. Look to see this a new wedge issue in the political campaign. To what extent should the 2nd Amendment be revisited by the new Supreme Court and the New Congress???
You can find some interesting information regarding the Krazy Korean's on line behavior that might have some clues into what was going through this guy's head. There is a fair amount of information over at Little Green Footballs and Hot Air sent to those sites from students. Here is an excerpt... Read the updates here and the more extensive updated over at their site -- ZZ
Looks like the bulletin board posting Bryan quoted last night was right on the money.
Seung Hui Cho, a permanent resident of the United States, a Korean national and a Virginia Tech student has been identified as the gunman in the shootings that left 33 people dead on the Virginia Tech campus Monday, ABC News has learned.
The student left a “disturbing note” before killing two people in a dorm room, returning to his own room to re-arm and entering a classroom building on the other side of campus to continue his rampage, sources said.
Cho’s identitiy has been confirmed with a positive fingerprint match on the guns used in the rampage and with immigration materials. It is believed that he was the shooter in both incidents yesterday. Sources say Cho was carrying a backpack that contained receipts for a March purchase of a Glock 9 mm pistol, sources said. Witnesses had also told authorities that the shooter was carrying a backpack. Sections of chain similar to those used to lock the main doors at Norris Hall, the site of the second shooting that left 31 dead, were found inside a Virginia Tech dormitory, sources confirmed to ABC News.
The university’s holding a press conference right now. Standby.
Update: The cops just confirmed his ID at the presser. He lived on campus at Harper Hall. Lab tests confirmed that one of the weapons was used in both shootings yesterday. WaPo had a hot tip about this early this morning, identifying the suspect as Korean, not Chinese as had previously been reported.
Update: They’re talking now about some of the heroes who helped slow Cho down during his rampage. Slublog sends along this story about Prof. Liviu Librescu, who held the classroom door shut while his students escaped through the windows. One fact it doesn’t mention: Librescu was a Holocaust survivor.
Update: Meanwhile, ABC still hasn’t retracted its alarmist post about high-capacity magazines.
Update: I still don’t understand how he managed to be so lethal while shooting randomly. 32 killed, 20+ wounded; how often does any sort of attack result in more dead than hurt? The cops did say that he lined some students up and executed them sequentially, but that’s strange too. He’s one guy, with (let’s assume) 10 guys in a line in front of him. After he shot the first two or three and the rest realized what was about to happen, wouldn’t they have rushed him?
A doctor interviewed this morning on CNN said the victims he’d treated had all been shot at least three times, so it could be that he came equipped with a huge volume of ammo and just kept spraying bullets. Although again, in that case, you’d expect more injured than killed. I wonder if we’re going to find out that he used an especially destructive form of ammo, hollow-tipped or something along those lines.
Update: Another thing. I haven’t read a single report yet of Cho saying anything during the shooting. In fact, a couple of people have noticed how calm and quiet he was. But to get people to line up, wouldn’t he have been screaming at some point (”Get in a line!” etc)? I’m assuming that no one would have lined up for him once they knew he was a killer, so the line up probably happened when he first entered the building, before anyone had reason to suspect him. But none of the students who were in the building at the time heard anything, at least from what I’ve seen, aside from gunshots.
Update: VTech’s student newspaper has an as-yet-incomple list of the dead and reports that people were shot in four different rooms in Norris Hall. The Times has an interactive graphic showing the layout of the campus and the buildings where the murders occurred.
At trip down memory lane back to 2004. We found this one in our archives which we felt was worth dusting off given the somber tone of the country at the moment.
By Kaleem Omar
President George W. Bush’s verbal gaffes have become the stuff of legend. He didn’t help his case very much when he said, “I stand by all my misstatements.” His critics say that he is the most illiterate president in American history.
His knowledge of geography, too, is not exactly world-class. He thinks Africa is a country. During the US 2000 presidential campaign, he was once asked by journalists if he had ever been to a foreign country. He replied,”I went to South America once. You know, there are a lot of countries down there.” The tone of his reply suggested that this fact had come as something of a surprise to him.
On July 1, 2003, in Washington, D.C., Bush came out with this gem:”You’ve also got to measure in order to effect change that’s just more – when there’s more than there’s just actual – a paradigm shift.” I defy anybody to make any sense of that.
In the six years and four months of Bush’s presidency, the number of such gaffes now runs into the hundreds, if not the thousands. Given this fact, it’s not surprising that Bush was a big winner at the”World Stupidity Awards’ at a gala star-studded presentation ceremony in Montreal, Canada on July 23, 2004.
Bush was voted”Stupidest Man of the Year” by an international audience at the second edition of the awards presented at the”Just For Laughs” festival, the world’s largest and most prestigious comedy festival. Not for nothing is young George known as Dubya.
Awards host Lewis Black, whose biting satire is a highlight of TV’s”The Daily Show”, took pride in the recognition of the United States at the awards, saying:”We are the gold standard.”
“It’s easy to fall down a manhole, it’s easy to put the candles too close to the drapes, it’s easy to launch a military invasion of another country based on a few blurry satellite photos,” he observed.”But this year my people, we scaled the Everest of stupidity and we stand upon the peak.” --- Read More
Then there is this timeless classic ... Fool Me Twice (audio)
Pelosi - Reid Sponsor Armed Personal Protection Act
Written this morning by satirist Scott Ott on the heels of the Virginia Tech shootings. Sarcasm for Pelosi and Reid abounds... he just could not resist taking a "shot" at these two in the wake of the VT tragedy. Tasteless? You be the judge.
(Satire: 2007-04-17) — The day after an unidentified man killed 32 people, and wounded many others at Virginia Tech in Blacksburg, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid recanted years of support for gun control laws and called on Congress to initiate a national weapons training program at schools that receive federal funding.“Since it’s clearly impossible to keep guns out of the hands of criminals,” Rep. Pelosi said, “the only way to hamper the evil plans of the deranged and wicked is to assure that their potential victims are not helpless.”
“As we have seen once again,” said Sen. Reid, “our gun-free school zones should really be called free-fire zones for terrorists and killers. Gun control laws only restrict the sale of weapons of self-defense.”
Under the Pelosi-Reid Personal Protection Act of 2007, all federally-funded colleges, universities and secondary schools would provide at least 40 hours of mandatory weapons safety and target shooting instruction.
Meanwhile, President George Bush continued to call on all Americans to pray for the wounded survivors and for the families of the dead, and he hailed the Pelosi-Reid Act as “an important step in making sure that no child is left behind.” --- as written by satirist Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
Writer Chip Hilton continues to please satirical enthusiasts. In this latest contrived film fantasy screenplay it's rumored that scientologist Tom Cruise, and trash mouth extraordinaire Don Imus, will team up to do this sequel to Brokeback Mountain. Chip Hilton gives us the details here from the screening preview...
(SATIRE: LOS ANGELES) - Former on-air personality Don Imus has been tipped to star with Tom Cruise in Talkback Mountain, the story of a radio talk show host of the same name who is run out of a small Western town after he mocks the sheriff's handicapped daughter during a live remote from the town's annual chili cook-off.
After tasting some of the crippled young woman's chili, Talkback, who is played by Mr. Imus, remarks, 'I'll bet that gimp don't eat this shit because if she did, she'd be up and running in no time, withered legs or not—and while we're on the subject, do you think she can put those legs behind her head?'
These remarks cost Talkback his job, his marriage—to a wooden Katie Holmes—and his sobriety; but just when he appears to be headed for boot hill, he meets a gay Scientologist, played by Tom Cruise, at a comfort station near the Grand Canyon.
That chance meeting turns Talkback around in more ways than one, and before you can say, 'Ouch, that hurts,' he is the host of 'Scientology in the Morning,' a call-in show on KASS in Los Angeles.
'Talkback Mountain, like Scientology, is all about redemption,' said Mr. Cruise. 'Who among us hasn't said or done something in public that he regrets? Let him who doesn't have a skeleton in his closet cast the first stone.' --- Hat Tip: Chip Hilton / PugBus"
(2007-04-12) — Just a day after MSNBC dropped its televised simulcast of WFAN’s Imus in the Morning radio program, the Rev. Al Sharpton called for the termination of every member of the news media who repeated, reprinted or replayed Don Imus’ derogatory remarks about the Rutgers women’s basketball team.
“It’s a civil rights issue,” said Mr. Sharpton, a professional former presidential candidate. “Everybody needs to be fired immediately, with no exceptions. The reporters who repeated the insult are worse than Imus, because people actually pay attention to some of them.”
Mr. Sharpton said that he should not be fired, however, despite his own frequent repetition of the insult on his national radio show, because he’s “a victim by definition and not a member of the oppressor class.”
“Every time I repeat that disgusting phrase, I’m personally offended and deeply hurt,” said Mr. Sharpton. “The pain is intensified by the fact that a white man has forced me to take those awful words into my mouth, thereby drawing even more attention to me. This is not about me. It’s about those brilliant, eloquent, highly-educated, physically-powerful young ladies at Rutgers who need me to defend them.”
MSNBC executives said they have already begun the search for a replacement show with “low production costs and no visual appeal, hosted by someone who’s crude and immature, but not insensitive, off-color but not insulting to people of color, and risqué without risking our advertising revenue.”
--- as reported by Scott Ott satirical reporter, author and editor for ScrappleFace
The educated and articulate young women at Rutgers did themselves proud this week. They no more needed the likes of the always comical Reverend Al Sharpton to come to their defense than Batman needed Robin as his annoying side kick. Now that the fearsome duo, Reverend Jesse Jackson and the good ole Reverend Al, have done their best to trip over each other to exploit this media event for themselves and get some extra "air time", we'd like you to ponder the following:
Now that Imus has been canned let's see just how much real energy, effort and public pressure these two are willing to place on punishing black hate rappers and their music industry executives for spreading these vile phrases on the airwaves and in the media? Will they crucify gangsta rap as actively and with the same forceful energy in order to retain any semblance of credibility and integrity within their black community? Now that they have extracted their pound of white flesh, how can it be business as usual without looking like hypocrites with massive double standards to both the black and white community?
The PAIN that found it's way to those awesome athletes at Rutgers has it's roots in a subculture that has only recently been questioned by black leaders.
A subculture of hateful rap lyrics, and debasing black stand up comedy has over the years begun to creep into both main stream music and stand up comedy -- ok, it seems as long as it is sung or spoken by blacks. However, ironically, now you will find both young white and black teens now openly sing these lyrics together in our nation's school yards and in their cars almost oblivious to images these lyrics convey, as the subculture blends into one grey color that disrespects not only women but life itself glorifying the gangsta's life. So what WILL the Reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton do about erradicating these hateful words from the next generation's subculture along with the images of disrespect for women as sex objects and the glorifying of lust, murder and money? Will they continue the lead the outcry and address the root cause?? Don't bet on it.
High profile democratic black leaders in congress have for the most part done virtually NOTHING to boycott it or control it. It's big business don't-cha-know. Instead the current double standard allows both music companies and the convicted felons who call themselves "artists", to prosper from a dysfunctional media, and yes, a dysfunctional society.
One would have thought the Northeaster that's pounding the East Coast would have kept stuff like this off the news for a while. The Blacksburg Va. police now also have their hands full trying to capture a random shooter on the VT campus. This is the second random shooting on the campus within a year. The campus has also been plagued with bomb threats according to information on their website. Servers at the website are choking from the thousands of site requests.
So another episode of terrorism right here in the homeland begins the week...
One has been taken into custody. Police are still searching for a possible 2nd gunmen... (there are no grassy knolls on the VT campus)
The shooting follows a week in which bomb threats were made at the school, which has an enrollment of about 26,000 students.
Police at the school, formally Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University, confirmed a gunman was wanted but had no further details.
The Buffalo News - AP Breaking News: "The shooting was reported at West Ambler Johnston Hall. Police were at the scene, Tech said on its Web site.
Officials ordered the campus closed, the second time in less than a year the 26,000-student campus was shut because of a shooting.
In August 2006, the opening day of classes was canceled and the campus closed when an escaped jail inmate killed a hospital guard and a sheriff's deputy involved in a massive manhunt just off the campus." More...
Here are some first hand accountings from students on the upheaval and turmoil on campus...
Student Matt Waldron said he did not hear the gunshots because he was listening to music, but he heard police sirens and saw officers hiding behind trees with their guns drawn.
"They told us to get out of there so we ran across the drill field as quick as we could," he said.
Waldron described the scene on campus as "mayhem."
"It was kind of scary," he said. "These two kids I guess had panicked and jumped out of the top story window and the one kid broke his ankle and the other girl was not in good shape just lying on the ground."
The shooting comes three days after a bomb threat Friday forced the cancellation of classes in three buildings, WDBJ in Roanoke reported. Also, the 100,000-square-foot Torgersen Hall was evacuated April 2 after police received a written bomb threat, The Roanoke Times reported.
After the Monday shooting, students were instructed to stay indoors and away from windows, police at the university said.
"A gunman is loose on campus. Stay in buildings until further notice. Stay away from all windows," read a warning from the university.
The shooting occurred at West Ambler Johnston Hall, a co-ed dormitory that houses 895 students. The dormitory, one of the largest residence halls on campus, is located near the drill field and stadium. AP
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From the off beat news files... [not satire, wish it was]
A Longmont business owner died Tuesday in Idaho after his parachute failed to open after he jumped from a bridge over the Snake River Canyon.
Yegor Drozdov died living the way he believed was best, said his friend and Longmont business partner, Chad Clark.
“His whole attitude was to experience life to its full potential, and he did,” said Clark.
Drozdov, 29, was living in Longmont while expanding his Massachusetts-based auto-sales business here with Clark.
He died after jumping from the 486-foot-high Perrine Bridge in southern Idaho, a popular spot for BASE jumpers, who parachute from high, fixed objects. BASE is an acronym for building, antenna, span, earth.
What a waste. I could think of 100 better ways to get a thrill and live to tell about it. read more | digg story
Damn - why can't this kind of thing happen to me? Brian Westbrook received an extra $3 million from the Philadelphia Eagles in an accounting error. He said he plans to repay them but hasn't yet - so they filed a grievance against him...
Go Brian Westbrook. See how much interest you can earn on that screw up before they force you to fork it over :) You gotta love pro sports! Read More...
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