N. Korea Launches Attack Against Sea of Japan

North Korea decided to launch a deadly attack against the Sea of Japan in the wake of a successful NASA shuttle launch this past July 4th. Not to be out done by NASA, DPRK engineers made a series of last minute adjustments to take out the Sea of Japan in an effort to demonstrate to the world that it wasn't going to sit back and continue to accept the constant pounding from that body of water along it's "people's coast line". NASA engineers marveled at the pin point accuracy of N. Koreas's new BigWang Dong-2 multi stage ICBM as it slammed into it's target in retaliation. See story below as reported by Scott Ott...

(2006-07-05) — North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il today acknowledged that he had ordered yesterday’s missile strikes against the Sea of Japan in response to what he called “threatening and provocative movements” that the body of water had made against his nation’s coastline.

U.S. sources said that as many seven missiles, including one long-range, short-flight Taepodong 2, penetrated the surface of the sea in a terrifying display of North Korean ballistic technology prowess.

“This clearly demonstrates our status as a global superpower,” said Mr. Kim, “The Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea is quite capable of raining fire from the sky upon any body of water that approaches our shores, or even thinks about it.”

The North Korean leader said the attack should “put other seas on notice that our precision-guided munitions can strike you at any time. ”

Meanwhile, China made a “goodwill gesture” aimed at gaining Mr. Kim’s trust and ending the nuclear crisis on the Korean peninsula by offering to provide replacements for the expended missiles.

“The people of North Korea can barely eat,” said an unnamed China spokesman, “So where would they get the money to buy new missiles? We consider this a humanitarian offer.”" --- satirical reporting by Scott Ott / ScrappleFace

Tags : satire, u.n., north korea, sea of japan, security council

Don't believe the above story for a minute. Scott, along with the rest of the main stream media, have been fooled by the goose stepping, muscle flexing North Koreans, who have in fact cleaverly tested, albeit under the guise of a "failed launch attempt", the world's first long range ICBT, or better known in military circles as an ICBT (intercontinental balistic torpedo).