Supreme Court Satire - Ten Commandments on Trial

We felt this satire was worth reprinting for our readers. Scott Ott at his best over at Scrappleface taking a shot at our social double standards. ScrappleFace: "High Court Mulls Commandments, Divine Intrusion
by Scott Ott

(2005-03-02) -- The U.S. Supreme Court this week hears oral arguments in two cases which ask them to decide whether the 10 commandments may be displayed on government property, and to what extent the constitution's privacy provision protects citizens from intrusion by God.

The 10 commandments case, while receiving more media attention, should be 'a no brainer,' according to a spokesman for the American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ), a Christian organization among the many that have filed friend-of-the-court briefs in the case.

'Displaying the famous list of thou-shalt-nots is simply secular recognition of historically-significant documents,' said the unnamed ACLJ spokesman. 'Even though God gave these laws to Moses and thus to all of humanity, we shouldn't make too much of that...after all, it's just a bunch of words similar to 'In God We Trust' and 'under God'. Nobody really takes them seriously...especially the first line, which says 'I AM the LORD thy God'. We expect the court will realize the religious insignificance of these totally-secular displays and let them stand.'

However, the second case on the high court docket this week asks a thornier question: 'Is God's knowledge of the private lives, and even thoughts, of all Americans an unconstitutional invasion of privacy?'

The case involves a Texas man, identified in court documents simply as 'Jonah A.', who alleges that God has been 'stalking' him for years, and seems to know things about his personal life that happened even when he was alone.

'Just because the Lord is omniscient and omnipresent, that doesn't mean he should be allowed to know everything and be everywhere,' said Jonah. 'The court needs to protect citizens from Divine intrusion.'

The plaintiff's case rests on the foundation of Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court ruling which found that the long-lost constitutional right to privacy protects women who want to abort their children.

Attorneys for the LORD say the deity's case is founded on the first line of the 10 commandments."

What are your thoughts ?