700-Mile ‘Concept Fence’ a Virtual Reality?

Today all Americans can sleep soundly knowing that their lawmakers in Washington have been burning the midnight oil in an effort to pass a bill to build a fence "in concept" along the southern border of the U.S. This "concept fence" as the good people over at ScrappleFace put it, will provide the deterrent that will ensure the security of all Americans from all the evils arising from the open border to the south. It's rumored however that a "concept fund raising events" are to be scheduled soon in all the major cities along the US / Mexican border. There will be also be a virtual ribbon cutting ceremony scheduled in the year 2010 when it is estimated that the concept fence will "in principle" be transformed to the "production fence" after years of testing the concept. Scott Ott over at Scrapple face puts his slant on today's story from the White House concept bill signing ceremony. The GOP is really grasping at straws!! Can you say desperate?

ScrappleFace:

(2006-10-26) — President George Bush today signed into law a bill that authorizes a 700-mile long "“concept fenceÂ" on the U.S.-Mexico border.

The concept fence, a project approved but not funded by Congress, is similar to a concept car, administration officials said.

According to an unnamed bill sponsor, "The concept fence is an insurmoutable barrier that will shut off the steady, daily flow of illegal aliens invading our country to take our jobs, boost our crime rate, burden our social welfare system and potentially bear contagious diseases or weapons of mass destruction. The concept fence is impossibly high, supercharged with 1.21 jigowatts of electricity, and each mile is guarded by a battalion of National Guard troops and a squadron of A-10 Warthog fighter jets."”

If the concept proves popular, officials said, Congress may eventually fund the actual "production fence" which will be a three-foot high hedge of juniper bushes.

Human rights advocates responded to the new law by charging that the 700-mile fence would force undocumented workers to squeeze through the remaining 1,400 mile border gap, possibly causing lacerations and brush burns.

Any ideas on what might be in store for the northern border with our Canadian friends? We are thinking along the lines of a 4,ooo mile mote stocked with lamprey, and patroled by hyperactive crazed sea otters connecting Vancouver with the Saint Lawrence Seaway.

Tags: satire, parody, sarcasm, bush, zz