U.N. Tables Iran Nukes, Debates Cheney Threat

ScrappleFace gives a full accounting of the changing priorites at the United Nations. It is reassuring to know that the Security Council remains vigilant protecting citizens of all nations around the globe...

(WASHINGTON) — The United Nations Security Council today tabled discussion about how to react to Iran’s ongoing nuclear weapons development in order to take up debate on what to do about U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney’s recently disclosed weapons capabilities.

“We don’t really know whether Iran is making a bomb, or just making cheap abundant electricity,” said an unnamed Security Council spokesman. “But we have hard evidence that Dick Cheney is armed and dangerous.”

The council will consider a variety of responses, from economic sanctions against Mr. Cheney, to a stringent inspection protocol with all weapons placed under U.N. seal, and 24/7 video monitoring.

“Of course, we cannot rule out a military response,” the source said. “We must keep our options open in dealing with what has quickly become the biggest weapons issue of our time.”" -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace