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We thought Scott's recent remarks regarding the cleanliness of the MiddleEastern geo-political map would resonate well with the Cox & Forkum satirical statement below.
(2005-10-27) -- The United Nations Security Council today took up discussion on what Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad might have meant when he called for Israel to be 'wiped out from the map'.
Secretary General Kofi Annan said Iran, as a member of the U.N., must be given the benefit of the doubt that the phrase was intended to encourage peaceful diplomacy.
''Wiped' is a word that can denote cleanliness,' said Mr. Annan. 'The Iranian president may have simply meant that the map should be cleaned so Israel's legitmate borders are easier to see.'
Mr. Ahmadinejad's remarks came during the month-long 'World without Zionism' celebration, and echoed the Ayatollah Khomeini's previous comments about map hygiene.
In related news, the U.S. House today begins debate on creation of a month-long holiday called 'World Without Islam-o-fascism,'
President George Bush said he looks forward to celebrating the new holiday with a ceremonial 'wiping of the map.'" -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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We hate to say I told you so, but we predicted this event the first week after her nomination.Controversial U.S. Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers has withdrawn her nomination after weeks of criticism over her qualifications for the role.
Miers said in a statement her nomination "would create a burden for the White House and our staff that is not in the best interest of the country."
President George W. Bush has "reluctantly" accepted her letter of withdrawal, White House officials said.
Miers, who most recently served as Bush's White House counsel, was nominated less than a month ago to replace retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor. More...
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Iraq Constitution Approval Another Setback for BushThis satirical piece is sure to spark some controversy. What's your opinon? Is it leadership or a sense of divine inspiration mixed with a dose of Texan stubborness that drives the President?
by Scott Ott
(2005-10-25) -- In yet another setback for the Bush administration, Iraqi electoral officials announced today that voters have approved the new Iraqi Constitution by a margin of 78-to-21 percent.
This new bit of bad news will likely drive President George Bush's popularity ratings into the single digits, according to an unnamed expert from a non-partisan, progressive political think-tank.
"The Bush foreign policy continues to be fatally-wounded by clarity of purpose, dogged persistence and a pathetic failure to capitulate in the face of opposition," the source said. "At a time when a real leader would be paralyzed with self-doubt over the meaningless deaths of 2,000 American troops, Bush continues to act as if freeing 25 million Iraqis from decades of oppression, torture and death is somehow worth the price paid by those who volunteered to fight."
"It's sad to watch our international credibility crumble like this," the anonymous policy expert said. "In 2008, I'm afraid you're going to see voters leaving the Republican party in droves, desperate to find a leader who provides a stronger sense of nuance and ambiguity." -- Scott Ott /ScrappleFace
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Iran will be the next major explosion in the Middle East. Iraq and Afghanistan may turn out to be of tremendous strategic importance in order to contain Iran and it's subversive terrorist intent in the region. They are the real future threat in the Middle East. Make no mistake about it. - zzb(London)"The UK Foreign Office is to summon a senior Iranian diplomat to protest against his president's comments about destroying Israel.
Hardliner Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has called for the Jewish state to be 'wiped off the map'.
The Foreign Office will call in Iran's London chargé d'affaires on Thursday. It said the comments were 'deeply disturbing and sickening'.
The remarks have heightened concerns over Iran's nuclear intentions." More...
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Yes, we have finally activated our Interactive Points System (IPS) at the ZZ OpenWeb.
Registered members accumulate POINTS for blog and forum posting, commenting, voting in polls, rating and visiting sites in our WebLinks Directory, sending blog posts to a friend and more. OpenWeb also provides you access to an array of free Blog Developers Tools and our Freeware Downloads section is also available to you at the 50 point level. More stuff is in store down the road at even higher levels!
So how do you earn POINTS? Stop by the OpenWeb and find out.
You can even cross post for points by submitting an article or post from YOUR blog with your references! How is that for extra site visability! We receive over 3000+ hits a week so why not register your site and get some free site exposure and join the OpenWeb community! - ZZ
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(Washington) "Exiled Rove Will Volunteer to Think for Bush
by Scott Ott
(2005-10-21) -- Deputy White House Chief of Staff Karl Rove today said that if a grand jury indicts him on charges related to the disclosure of Valerie Wilson's CIA role, forcing him to resign, Mr. Rove will still help President George Bush to think.
The long-time Bush friend and strategist said he would continue, on a strictly volunteer basis, to aide the president in making decisions even if he has to do it 'through letters or brief prison visits.'
'The people elected us President of the United States,' said Mr. Rove, 'and even without my presence in the White House, George Bush is still technically America's chief executive. As an ordinary citizen, I'll volunteer to help my country where I can.'
In the waning days of the grand jury, as special prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald mulls whether to bring criminal charges, Mr. Rove said he spends every waking hour mapping strategy for the final three years of the Bush presidency, 'just in case I'm ever held incommunicado and he has to do this all by himself.'
When Mr. Rove completes the project, he said Mr. Bush will have a deck of laminated index cards, arranged by subject, that will tell him in plain language what to do in any situation--from how to pick a replacement for Mr. Rove, to how to respond to Iranian nuclear weapons deployment, to which fork to use for salad at a White House dinner.
'Our friends and our enemies need to know,' he said, 'that even when Karl Rove is in exile, George Bush still has access to one of the greatest minds that ever occupied the Oval Office. I may not be there actually whispering in his ear anymore, but as long as the president has my talking points, he's still the George Bush everyone knows and loves.'" -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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Here is one interesting compendium of blogging tips and technical cyber stealth techniques that bloggers wishing to remain annonymous from their employeers (or anyone else for that matter) might consider adopting as a first read bible.ZardozZ OpenWeb Review: - Handbook for Bloggers and Cyber-Dissidents: "Handbook for Bloggers and Cyber-Dissidents compiles a central source of information on some basic, practical advice for bloggers as well as some very advanced techniques for ensuring that a blogger's identity remains anonymous if that is important them. With handy tips and technical advice on how to to remain anonymous and to get around censorship, by choosing the most suitable method for each situation.
It also explains how to set up and make the most of a blog, to publicise it (getting it picked up efficiently by search-engines - like those that visit here which are optomized for indexing in our site map and OpenWeb Links Directoy) and to establish its credibility through observing basic ethical and journalistic principles.
You can download this very interesting manual from our Downloads Section in the Misc. catagory if you are a registered user.
It is in .pdf format (1.5Mb) 48 pages. Freebie for OpenWeb members.
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(Washington) -- Senate Judiciary Chairman Arlen Specter, R-PA, announced today he will delay confirmation hearings for Supreme Court nominee Harriet Q. Miers until he can locate some Senators who are intellectually qualified to question her on the finer points of Constitutional law.
'Most of us in the Senate used to be lawyers,' said Sen. Specter, 'and you can't expect a simple ambulance chaser to understand the kind of weighty issues that come before the Supreme Court.'
The chairman noted that Senators not only 'lack the intellectual heft' to comprehend Constitutional law and formulate questions about it, but many of them became lawmakers through 'what amounts to a popularity contest.'
'The average senator holds his seat thanks to personal wealth, political cronyism and the ability to perform for the camera,' Sen. Specter said. 'Those are hardly qualifications for scrutinizing a potential Supreme Court justice about the various theories related to original intent.'
White House spokesman Scott McClellan said the president encouraged Sen. Specter to proceed with the hearings anyway.
'As you know,' Mr. McClellan said, 'you go into confirmation hearings with the Senate you have, They’re not the Senate you might want or wish to have at a later time.'" - Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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"A lot of conservative Republicans say they are very upset about President Bush's choice of Harriet Miers. They say she has no experience, she doesn't know anything about constitutional law, and she's never shown any interest in it. Where were these people with the high standards when they nominated Bush to be president?" --Jay Leno
"She's never been a judge before, never served on the bench. This is part of President Bush's strategy of surrounding himself with people who are also in over their heads." --Jay Leno, on Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers
"President Bush tried to reassure conservative that Harriet Miers was the best choice for the Supreme Court. He said twenty years from now she'll be the same person she was today. Twenty years ago she was a Democrat, and Catholic." --Jay Leno
"Interesting woman this Harriet Miers. She used to be a Democrat, and then she found God and became a Republican. Which is kind of backwards, because usually in Washingotn you become a Republican, get indicted, go to jail, then you find God." --Jay Leno
"A lot of Republicans are baffled by this choice. You can't really blame them. I mean, think about it. We have a more rigorous selection process on 'The Apprentice' than we do on the Supreme Court. At least let her get grilled by Trump." --Jay Leno
"Records show (Miers) gave money to Al Gore's campaign, and she also called President Bush the most brilliant man she ever met. And this is the woman we're hiring for her judgment?" --Jay Leno
"Welcome to the 'Late Show,' ladies and gentlemen. It's like the Supreme Court, anyone can get in here." --David Letterman
"Harriet Miers, as you know, has no experience. Apparently no experience is the main requirement to be a Bush appointee." --David Letterman
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Here's a dude who needs a cranial autopsy performed on him actually BEFORE he O.Ds. to advance the knowledge of medical science."Oh, Boy, what's going on? Boy George was arrested Friday for drug possession and filing a fake police report. But, the former Culture Club crooner denies that the small amount of cocaine found in his New York digs is his. The singer's lawyer told the New York Post, 'He does not know where it came from. He's had a lot of people in his house.' Boy, real name George O'Dowd, called police to say his place had been burglarized, but when police arrived, they found the blow. In 1986, he was convicted of heroin possession before entering rehab." More...
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Harriet Miers' qualifications to be a Supreme Court justice and her views on privacy rights will be a focus of her confirmation hearings, Senate Judiciary Committee chairman Arlen Specter says.
Miers must show she can handle complicated legal issues and has not cut deals with the White House to overturn the 1973 Roe v. Wade ruling that legalized abortion, Specter, R-Pa., said Sunday on ABC's 'This Week.'
President Bush's nomination of Miers, a longtime confidante and White House counsel but never a judge, has caused division among conservatives. A leader of the right said he will not be satisfied until it is clear whether she would vote to overturn the abortion ruling.
'You can be an evangelical and you can be self-described pro-life,' Gary Bauer, president of the American Values Coalition, said of Miers. 'But it doesn't tell us what she will do about a decision like Roe that has been set in stone now for over 30 years. And that's the rub.'
Specter, noting that a justice has lifetime tenure, said: 'If there are backroom assurances and if there are backroom deals and if there is something which bears upon a precondition as to how a nominee is going to vote, I think that's a matter that ought to be known.'" More...
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Experts have long been warning of the danger of serious earthquakes in South Asia - and say more are likely.
Many have struck along the southern flanks of the Himalayas over past centuries - but not enough to account for all the steady, northward movement of India into Asia.
The earthquake in Pakistan is the result of India's long-term, gradual, geological movement north into Asia at a speed of five centimetres a year - a millimetre per week.
Earthquakes happen when energy stored up along geological faults, like the Himalayan thrust, is suddenly released.
The trouble is, the more time passes without seismic release, the more energy accumulates, making a giant earthquake more likely." More...
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President Hints at Greenspan ReplacementLaura Bush as a Federal Reserve chairwoman? Don't laugh. Given the impeccable "inner circle intuition" of Dubbya, holding a national lottery of toll booth attendents as a selection process for the next Fed leader might just serve us better than an appointment by this "trust me.. wink" president.
by Scott Ott
(2005-10-07) -- In the midst of a Republican firestorm over his so-called 'stealth' appointment of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, President George Bush today would only hint at who he has in mind to replace Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan, who will retire January 31, after 18 years steering the nation's monetary policy.
'I can't give you a name,' Mr. Bush told the White House press corps, 'but let me just say that I've known her personally for more than 20 years, and have first-hand knowledge of her philosophy on fiscal policy. I've actually watched her balance a checkbook at the kitchen table. She'll make a swell Fed chairman.'
Mr. Bush said the as-yet-unnamed nominee 'has a charming personality, a smile that lights up the room, and I can trust her like I trust my own wife.'" -- Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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ScrappleFace: After Miers, Bush Promises Big Fight with Dems
(2005-10-04) -- President George Bush, in an effort to calm the Republican party's conservative base after his appointment of the relatively-unknown Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, today promised that he would 'make things right by picking a fight' with Congressional Democrats in early 2006.
'I know my fellow right-wingers were hoping for a big ideological brawl over this nomination,' said Mr. Bush in a letter to supporters. 'I guess for some of us, this feels like winning a baseball game by forfeit when the other team doesn't show up. You still get the win, but it doesn't get your blood going.'
The president assured conservatives that he has ordered White House staff to 'identify an issue where it's more important to stage a public fight with Democrats than to accomplish our strategic goals.'
'When we find that issue,' Mr. Bush told the party faithful, 'I'll just walk up to Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid and spit in his eye.'" -- Scott Ott
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(Washington)"US President George Bush has chosen a close aide, White House counsel Harriet Miers, for a key Supreme Court vacancy.
If approved by the Senate, Ms Miers - who has never sat as a judge - will take up the place left by Sandra Day O'Connor, who stepped down in July.
Ms Miers, 60, said she was humbled. The Supreme Court is one of the most influential bodies in US public life.
But some of Mr Bush's supporters have expressed concern at her lack of conservative credentials.
Mr Bush's announcement came as the Supreme Court prepared for its first day of work after the summer recess.
The nine-member court will be considering some of the most bitterly contested social issues in the US, including assisted suicide, abortion, same-sex marriage, human cloning and campaign finance law." More...
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(WASHINGTON) (Reuters) - Xena, the possible 10th planet in our solar system, has its own moon, a dim little satellite called Gabrielle, its discoverers reported.
Astronomers who reported Xena's discovery in July said they detected Xena's sidekick on September 10 using the Keck Observatory on Mauna Kea in Hawaii. Their findings will be submitted to the Astrophysical Journal Letters on Monday.
'Since the day we discovered Xena, the big question has been whether or not it has a moon,' Michael Brown, of the California Institute of Technology, said in a statement. 'Having a moon is just inherently cool -- and it is something that most self-respecting planets have, so it is good to see that this one does too.'" More...
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This should spell the end to tourism in Bali. Our hearts go out to the victims of this sick perverted act. Any doubt this is the work of Islamic extremists?Aljazeera.Net - Death toll rises in Bali bomb blasts: "Three near simultaneous bombs on the Indonesian island resort of Bali have killed at least 22 people and wounded more than 50, including many foreign tourists.
Indonesian police said three bombs were used in coordinated blasts that ripped through restaurants and cafes in a crowded tourist centre on the island on Saturday.
Bali police chief Made Mangku Pastika said two bombs exploded at different seafood restaurants along Jimbaran Beach at 8pm (1200 GMT) while a third hit a cafe in Kuta town square 30km away.
Putu Putra Wisada, spokesman for the Sangla Hospital in Denpasar, said 11 dead were taken to the hospital and 38 others were admitted with injuries - eight Australians, two Americans and 28 Indonesians." More...
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Humor Times - A Profile of the Burning Bush (May 19, 2015 04:00)
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